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The Peerless Goth
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The other Travis Pike rhyme to appear in CalPoly's 1973 Spring edition of the CalPoly OPUS magazine was The Peerless Goth, later incorporated into the original stage version of Changeling, and recorded during a Changeling Troupe session at Conway Recording Studios in Hollywood. On this page, you have a choice of reading the rhyme, listening to Travis's performance for the unsold Changeling album, or both.
"Why me?" said the Drang, in a sulky mood
"Why should I be the one to go?"
But the Peerless Goth only closed his eyes,
Which dismissed the matter, you know.

So the Drang fetched up his grundle
And went herrilly on his way,
But not without a sour snout,
And more that he dare not say.

The Cuspis offered no complaint,
And quietly went to his chores,
But his hard pressed lips gave his soul away
For such tasks he sinply abhors!

"I won't! I won't!," rave the ugly Grunch.
"I'll never do it again!
This is positively the very last time!"
And he, too, went herrilly fenn.

"So, now, at last, you've come to me,"
Said the Frice, "but do as you may,"
I'm really quite self-sufficient, you know.
I needn't do as you say!

"It's just lucky for you, that this time I will,
But be warned that you stand alone,
For I side with the Ugly Grunch and the Drang
And the Cuspis is only on loan!"
And thus it progressed for some period of time
And the Goth kept the system intact,
And the work was done, and new tasks assigned,
"but the Goth grew disgusted. In fact,

Finally the Goth in a fit of his own
Vanished right into thin air,
And the Drang, and the Frice, and the Ugly Grunch
And the Cuspis could find nothing there!

Oh, how they cried in ecstasy!
"We're free to do as we will!"
"What shall it be?" they cried in glee,
But there came a sudden chill,

For the hadn't a single thing to do
And so, with much foam and froth,
They arrived at this brilliant conclusion.
They'd seek another Goth!

At last, everything was settled,
Their new Goth was very bright.
Everything began with a brand new zeal,
Until, on a sultry night,

"Why me?" whined the Drang, in a sulky mood.
"Why should I be the one to go?"
But the Peerless Goth only closed his eyes
And the rest of the story, you know."

Defining characteristics: bard. n. [Gael. and Ir. bard; of Celtic origin.] 1. a poet. [Poetic.] 2. among the ancient Celts, a poet who sang or recited verses of his own composition, usually to the accompaniment of the harp. 3. formerly, a minstrel or wandering musician of Scotland. (Editor's note. Influenced by Campbell and Graves, our independent scholar finally and deliberately set himself upon the path of the bard. Shockingly enough, he began by enrolling in college!)